I had a talk with my mom and dad today. They have always been able to ground me when I am at sea. Not that I feel at sea, per se, but we had a good conversation that brought out some stuff for me. Mainly, that I have been suffering with skin issues/toxicity and also feeling detached emotionally/spiritually for many years. Both of these things I have been very aware of but have been  unable to act in order to change the situation.

One would think that with the birth of my first child I would have awoken then. In fact, I really hoped that I might; that with the birth of this amazing miracle I would somehow see life and living in the moment with deep clarity. Instead I ended up dealing with a lot of brain fog brought on by sleep deprivation. There were certainly moments of pure joy from the simplest observations of my daughter as she grew and developed; small glimpses, but not enough to shake me from the fog.

I’m still in it, but it seems like there has been an orchestrated shift ( who is orchestrating it, I don’t know) that has finally spurred me on to make changes.

I was trying to pin-point when the moment happened. I think I was just finding ways to zone out in the few “me-time” hours I had using Netflix. But instead of zoning out with brainless content I found a few shows that started to really inspire me. I believe, I watched “Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead“. Not a huge eye opener, as I am happy to report that I am not in such dire dietary straights as the guy in this documentary…but it did remind me and inspire me to look again at what I was eating and consider, if not juicing, at least green smoothies. Around that same time I also watched a four-part series on Netflix, produced by Michael Pollen (of ‘ the Omnivore’s Dilemma’ fame) called” Cooked“. A beautiful look at where our food comes from and extremely inspiring in terms of returning to the home cooked meal and real foods.

It also inspired me to compulsively buy a book on Amazon about baking rustic bread at home. It remains to be seen whether that book will be used (especially now that I’m avoiding sugars). I hope so. But the compulsive spending was also coming to a head and lead me to come up with this shopping detox challenge I set for myself.

And then, almost simultaneously, as I was committing to this shopping detox, my body started to let me know, via persistent and spreading eczema, that I also needed a physical detox as well. Having watched the various documentaries about nutrition, I felt like I could be fairly confident about how to start improving what I considered an “already decent diet”. If I’m honest with myself, I’d been letting a lot slide, namely allowing much more sugar into my diet, giving into the cravings I’d developed post baby.

Now I am in the middle of watching a 9 episode docuseries called the ” Truth About Cancer, A Global Quest” ( thank you Auntie G), and it really comes down to what we put in our bodies. Pure, unadulterated food is our medicine. All of these shows have a common theme, which is to return to nature for the source of our health. So, that is what I am going to do. It all ties in perfectly, because as I focus on healing, both mentally, emotionally and physically the need for spending needlessly will fade and the vitality I anticipate will inspire me to do only the things that serve to strengthen my physical and spiritual well being.

I set out to detox my shopping habit, and it has snowballed into much more.

All of this could be seen as rather overwhelming. And it is. But I am also very excited. Finally I feel like this is the time. Somehow, I’ve been waiting to be ready and now I am.

These are still the early days folks, I suspect that my resolve and enthusiasm will fluctuate. I just hope that I’ve set a good enough structure to this challenge and enough checks and balances via my community, to keep me going.

Thank you for your support. Much like Tinker Bell, knowing you believe in me keeps me strong. Feel free to hit the “Follow” button I added to my page to get email notifications of my most recent posts.

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